Diss or accident?

Its spring break heh finally time to relax and work on what ever I wanna do and hang out and whatever basically XD Life has rather been going on nothing really to look forward too just going on with my days day by day planning what I wanna do but I guess most of my plans consist of me being older and doing what Id like to do in the future. I guess my current things to do is probably get my 4.0 and drop some weight.

Heh so last grading period I got a 3.7 not bad close to a 4.0 but its ok its just a progress report so nothing special. Loosing weight hmm im acctually really determined to drop a lot of weight before senior year starts and I think thats possible im pretty sure it sok to drop a little weight each day.

So I kinda have a irritation going on, at the same time im trying to understand the situation but at the same time it kinda sucks. So let me just say, one of my "best friends" has moved away back to where he was before, before coming to the states and even when he wasnt in the states we still had talked a lot. Now hes back to where he came from and we barly talk and most of the time hes on hes talking to his boyfriend and spending time catching up with him. I understand they had a big thing for each other and still do but It kinda upsets me cause its like wow so am I the back up person to talk to when hes not around thats not cool.

I guess it just bothers me cause ever since you left or even before you left you just always kept contact with him saying your goodbyes when dammit you guys havent even met in person yet. It really bothers me cause its like wow really and you wanna talk to me when hes gone heh thats fucked up.

I kind of understand theres a huge time gap between where we are now and your boy friend lives near me and heh I dont see how its fair you make time to keep contact with him but as for me like im just gone. Idk I think its just sad that im back u pto talk to when hes gone. Im sure you finally found friends you can open up to like you did with me. So I guess your done with me.

I guess it happens but at the same time why did you have to do it to me when you knew I already go through a lot of crap heh I also LOVE how you even admit that you just go on to catch if your boyfriend is on heh what ever. I dont want you to expect me to be there anymore. I really dont, I prefer if you didnt cause Idk ive been trying to drop our friendship for a while now but I keep telling myself that its alright what ever it will get better but it hasnt, its just been boring and I personally dont wanna stick around something/someone that doesnt make me happy :\ Ive grown I didnt fuck up my first semester. heh no offense but wow I seriously cant believe you did that to yourself. I kinda laugh cause it started getting worse when you got with your boyfriend. Heh you seemed fine and ok holding yourself up when school started till HE came along...

What ever as long as your happy I wont bitch after this blog anymore. Im done :\